For the longest time, I was praising God with both hands lifted high but deep within, my heart was stewing in displeasure. I had my arms crossed tight across my chest and my nose was raised in reproach when I saw those around me having the good things I craved for.

I was so desperate in wanting that which I had my mind on, it consumed all of me. Disappointed wasn’t even cutting it close to what I felt internally.

Truth is, I was furious with God. The questions were plenty, the years had gone by and I still did not receive what I longed for with all of my heart.

It wasn’t until one night (back in April) when the final missing piece of the puzzle was revealed.

It wasn’t an immediate realisation after I heard the upsetting news. As I drove home that night, the Holy Spirit - gentle as ever - gave me a little nudge and that was when the revelation sunk in. Had I received what I thought I wanted, I would have landed myself in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship; the wounds, deep and the scars, perennial.

Regret enveloped my heart. How wrong was I to kick up a fuss, protest and assume, thinking God was holding out on me when all He did was love, protect and save me from future heartache.....

That night was the first time in a very long time when I thanked God for not giving me what I wanted and learned one of the most precious wisdom of all: