When you pattered into my life, I was at a pivotal intersection in my career - I wanted change, but I did not know what the future held, which part of the world I would end up in, how life was going to look like. In the midst of all the uncertainties, to be incredibly honest, I did not know what to do with you.

I was not sure if I made the right decision to have you or commit to you. I was not certain if I had the ability to care for you or the capacity to love you.

A week later, I had my answer - I was going to move to Bangkok, with you in tow.

Since you came into my life, I have said “No, Flynn” 46372746 times (and then some), pried unidentified objects out of your tiny mouth far too many instances, replaced bed paraphernalia (sheets, duvet, pillow cases) gnawed on, got up in the middle of the night to clean Pollock-like puke (and you), awakened to you standing on my chest and staring me down, chased after and chastised you for stealing floor mats, and picked up more poop than I ever have in my lifetime.

A year later, I realised - I have never loved and laughed more, with you in my life.

You revealed patience in me that I did not know was present. You restored laughter in my life that I did not know was missing. You healed parts of my heart that I did not know was broken.

Happy First Birthday, Flynn! Thank you for saving me. I love you so very much. 

Love,

Mummy.