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ALERT (yawn): Kimye weds

Two jackasses got married in Italy Saturday.

Sex-tape star Kim Kardashian, 33, wed egotist Kanye West, 36, in a wedding opulent enough for Florence’s Medici dynasty and tacky enough for reality TV.

They were betrothed at Florence’s 16th-century Fort di Belvedere castle. Olympic athlete Bruce Jenner walked Kim down the aisle.

The republic still stands.