Chatty Lass

He's here, my heart and soul knows that full well. It is the barely there presence; the gentle reassurance that tells me He really is here (with me) and He knows, He knows it all.

It is the resting and being still in His presence, knowing that He is God and allowing Him to BE God over and in my (our, if you're believing with me for a miracle/a breakthrough/etc...) situation.

I sometimes would wish that there were an on and off switch in life, a rewind and erase menu control and a fast-forward button - It'll make life a smoother cruise and the world a more pleasant place to be in (99% of the time, it is during the lower points as I am already sure you can tell).

But tonight, I'm convinced - He IS the beginning and end.

"From my heart to the heavens, Jesus be the center..."

I’ve not been in a good place this past week. Simply because my mind has been regaling and my heart has been aching.

I shared with one of my closest confidante about this pressing matter. She suggested that I write about it, pour my heart and bare my soul out on paper - “It’ll do you good, just take a stab at it,” she gently suggests.

So, here I am (at her suggestion) huddled beneath the cold air-conditioning in my room; wrapped in quilt and armed with my laptop, I try to make sense of things by writing it out.

I’ve been told umpteen times (from since I was a child) that curiosity killed the cat. “Don’t let curiosity get the better of you. It pays to leave some things unknown in life,” I’ve been told. Yet, the inquisitive side of me would never let things drop that easily. I like attempting to decipher codes, coming across complex questions and unearthing the answers.

Well, for the most part, Curiosity won. It prevailed and had its’ way. Some good tales have come out of it, a couple of pretty shocking answers and surprisingly little trouble or heartache. But, I knew that it all seemed too easy to take in and (in as much as I am not fond of cliches, it is apt for this moment in time) too good to be true.

Sure enough, Curiosity decided to put down the final card in the last moment of the game, and this time around, I lost. I staked my mind in it (not knowing that in doing that) I had also unwittingly roped in my heart.

One bad decision and I lost both my mind and heart in a game that I shouldn’t have played.

Pray with me and pray for me – I know that He’s here, in the midst of the storms. I know that eventually “all things will work out for good for those who love Him” (Romans 8:28) and I am “holding unswervingly to the hope I profess for (I know) that He who has promised IS faithful.” (Hebrews 10:23 – Emphasis and paraphrase, mine)

I am now on the road to get the both of them back, and getting them back right on track.

Sweetest baby (From birth till now - she's coming to 5 months soon - She has never cried, not even ONCE, while in my arms) with the most fashionable outfits (She comes to church in a tutu!) accompanied by some of the cutest headbands or hair clips I've ever seen.

P/S: I'll probably have to trade and replace Baby Time and Baby Therapy with Chocolate Dates and Movie Nights for the next couple of months.

It is no secret to the readers of Chatty Lass (most of whom are friends) that I adore babies and I would love to have some of my own, some time in life later on.

So, it is natural (and not at all weird) for me to think of all things baby - Coos and gurgles, their sweet scent, deep-bellied laughter (usually after contorting one's face into something peculiar, like say a goldfish), little fingers and tiny toes, and the list goes on.. and on... and on.

Today, before returning to the Concrete Jungle (which would mean no more Baby Time for the next 4 months), I paid a visit to my favourite baby in the whole wide world.

After a "certain feisty Queen donning a yellow frock" incident that took place some time last week, I thought that I had seen it all when it comes to displeasure masked as cheekiness.

That was until today's arvo. I logged into Facebook and saw a photo a friend of mine uploaded which immediately sent me convulsing with fits of laughter.

Happy Tuesday!

Character and attitude - I genuinely believe that those are the two most important elements that define a person.

The church will not be shaken or compromised if it had a little less talent. However, it would be gravely tragic if a church is made up of people with incredible talent but dubious character and bad attitude.

We all need to realise that in ministry, it is not just the service that matters. Let me re-phrase that - Attitude and the manner in which we serve, that matters more when compared to the act of serving in itself.

All of us reading this today (if you are serving one way or another) - HOW are you serving in the capacity that has been entrusted to you? WHAT is the attitude you carry when serving our Lord Jesus?

One of the senior worship leaders at DUMC eloquently shared this quote last year at their church's WorshipGOD Conference: "Don't go where your giftings take you, but your character cannot sustain you." (It's honest and blunt, but it gets you thinking - Am I having the right character and attitude to shoulder my giftings?)

This is something we need to look into, think about, sincerely check our hearts and ask the Lord to continually change us; strength to strength, glory to glory (Psalm 84:7).


Love to all,
Melissa.

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Related post(s):

• Sustaining Character
  
  
• Giving Your Best
  

Simple truth and gentle reminder - To always believe and be passionate about what we do, and remember WHY we are doing it - When that happens, the applause of men or the criticisms/lack of support/negative word/etc... will not affect us much.

Dabbled around and got my hands dirty with Windows Live Movie Maker for the very first time.

I decided to make a video as a prelude before my message this Saturday.

Here's the teaser vid to keep you going (before I reveal the full video on Sattiday.)

Came by divine wake-up call at 3am earlier today.

I LOVE His super early morning wake-up calls!

In light of an event that happened earlier today, we all need some stats to keep us going. Here's mine:

Message preparation level: 50%.
Excitement level: 85% (I still get nervous, at times!).
Expectation-for-God-to-do-His-thing level: 110%.

And no, you did not just become an aunt yesterday by name and title alone – it is a whole new and added identity to who you are and whom you matter to.

You may not have realised it just yet, but the entry of this little one into this world, welcomed into the loving arms of your family and ultimately, finding way into your heart will change your world.

From his fresh baby smell and tiny toes to his first words, and to his coming to you for advice on girls (I trust that you’ll be a good Aunt and teach him to not be a heartbreaker, he is quite a handsome little baby!), you matter to yet another person on this earth.

I’m so thrilled for you, m’dear and I can’t wait to visit Baby Darius some day.


Much much love,
Melissa.

My last weekend in Penang for a little while. The theme for my message this Saturday.

I've written before on this, I am not one who loves slicing a fellow person to pieces with the wielding of my tongue (or otherwise known as arguing).

No holds barred and every card laid down on the table, I must confess to loving a healthy debate every now and then; just because I (am only slightly narcissistic and so) relish the feeling of being right and proving the other person wrong.

And so, YES, I generally despise arguments.

However, I'll make an exception just this once and allow an argument video to be published here on Chatty Lass. It's too cute to miss out on!

SO good for the soul, my heart is completely blessed just by declaring the lordship and authority of Christ in and over my life.

The bridge of this beautiful song, "From my heart to the heavens, Jesus be the center, it's all about You, it's all about You" sums us up as Christians - where Christ and Christ alone be our all in all, ALL that matters and our everything. He truly is.

Today, I had Brea (that's breakfast, lunch and tea, you uncool person) in Bed.

My guilty pleasure? My very own homemade SECOND (first being my world renowned potato salad) legendary culinary dish - Pancakes.

P/S: Daddy, Mummy and Angeline - If any of you are reading this right now, there's no need to drool. I saved some for all of you. I know how much you've missed my awesome pancakes.

The last time I saw Baby Kyra was almost 3 months ago. In the three months that I have been away, she thrived and grew - to be more and more luscious by the day, with huge brown eyes and gorgeous lashes to boast.

I visited her and her Mumma today, the three of us had lunch and later in the evening, tea break; complete with tea, a scone and a muffin (only two of us ate though, the third gazed longingly but is not ready for food consumption just yet).

Her Mumma thinks that I am bias, and I guess that I am; but all in good faith and rightly so - because I happen to think that she IS the cutest baby I have ever seen.

All afternoon, I was serenaded with the singing of her lovely gurgles, treated to her sweet baby scent and in turn, she got a bucket of smooches on her chubby cheeks.

I hate to boast, but I think that I have had the best afternoon with my girls.

Baby Kyra: "Look Jie Jie Melissa, I am rocking the booties you gave me. Now, did I bring it, or did I bring it?"

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Dearest Ky-Shen and Pam,

Thank you for honouring me with the privilege of worship leading on your Big Day. It was my delight and pleasure to do so.

Pam,

Thank you for your friendship; the sharing (of plans, dreams, hopes, girly chatter, advice and life lessons) sessions we've had (for the most part) over karaoke and late night drives. I am blessed to call you my friend, and even more blessed to be able to do life with you.

I pray that your home will always be filled with laughter and joy, peace and love.

With love and tight hugs,
Melissa.

P/S: Now that the Royal Wedding of The Century is over, do you think you can hurry up and beat Kate Middleton's (not as attractive and frankly, as popular, as her sister, Pippa's) rear end and procreate? I sure would love to have some more baby time, it's essential for my mental health. Thank you very much. :p

That was the supposed first line for my entry early this week, which endured several days of delay, as you well know now.

This week was a packed one – Had a rehearsal on Monday, prepared my songs list by Thursday, music rehearsal on Friday, worship practice early Saturday morning, worship led for my friend’s (who made such a beautiful bride) wedding at my first ever wedding worship leading engagement in the evening, worship led for Sunday Service this morning - My weekend was filled with singing engagements.

I’m excited, and really thrilled to be doing once again what I love doing the most.

As I reflected on the incredible journey I’ve been on to a new place for the past four months, it has been one of the most tumultuous and challenging times of my life. But, it has also been one of the most rewarding.

I re-discovered myself again. I found what I am made of, who I truly am on the inside, what I really love doing – what drives me to do just that and what are the motives behind it. It is a special heart and attitude check.

Worship has always captivated my heart in a very distinctive way, it always has.

One of the things I continually speak of about worship is to not take our gifts for granted and to use them wisely; perpetually remembering to channel all the glory to God and not ourselves. And, that is SO true. There is nothing in us worth heralding or lauding about – After all, none we have are ours to claim.

However, recent days have had me meditating and seeing worship, gifts and serving in a completely different light.

I learned that true worship (worship in the essence of its word is ‘worth-ship’ – to accolade worth to something or someone) requires us to love God more than we love our gifts. (That’s a tough one, really!)

As a person who relishes the creative side of things, it is difficult to imagine life without the gifts that has been entrusted to me. I daresay my heart aches and it pains me (even if it’s just momentarily) to try and make out life without creative urges.

But, I am taught and am learning that in as much as I love gifts, talents and creativity, real and truthful worship is not about using our gifts to make a joyful noise unto the Lord or infuse His throne with the sweet aroma of His people congregating to worship Him – It’s about loving Him, and just that, period.

I promise to write more on this in the near future.

It IS 12.45am now, and my eyes are beginning to look more and more like slits by the second.

As you begin a new week, I pray that His love infuses your life, His promises be your assurance and security, His grace keep and sustain you throughout.

With all my love for you,
Melissa.

Tonight is the last straw.

It is done and over with.

I’m tired. I’m exhausted from a game that no longer thrills me. I’m jaded from the nights wondering the what if-s and what might-s.

No more; not now, not ever.