I am anticipating what 2011 holds.

As I was doing my quiet time, deep within me, I am secured on this: 2011 is a year of the Sovereign Lord's favour. It is the year of unfolding glorious plans and unravelling His destiny for our lives.

That said, there are bittersweet emotions bubbling within me.

Change is not easy.

Change is not easy when you’re comfortable where you’re at. Change causes heartache when you take into consideration leaving your loved ones for prolonged period of time. Change is heartbreaking when you are torn between education and current ministry.

Change doesn’t come across as that fun anymore.

At a point in my life, I wanted change. I felt that my life was stagnant. All I was doing became a routine. Life felt staid.

Now that Change has come along the way, weaved itself (seamlessly) into my Life’s quilt, I resent it.

I hate the mixed feelings that keep me up at night. I resent the tears that trickle down my pillow when I try to picture leaving.

Night after night, I’ve poured out my heart to the Keeper of my Heart. Sometimes like a spoilt brat, other times with resentment, followed by tears.

My line in the fourth paragraph of this entry is not complete. I said this, “Change is not easy", BUT Change is essential for building, growing and rooting.

Favour, Destiny and Growth - Over and over again, I feel this in my Spirit.

My will, personally, is to not go.

When I look around at all that is surrounding me, Reluctance pulls me back and envelopes me with Familiarity. Comfort stands pretty close by as well, lending a helping hand to Familiarity.

But when I look at His face for His will, He says “Go”.

Just that - two alphabets, one syllable word, “Go”.