I have not been writing something substantial for more than a week.

This time around, the bout of emotional ardour hit hard. I have not fully recover. My emotional state is a hodgepodge of feelings meshed together, some more than the others.

I am not ready to share just yet.

I need to gather my thoughts, regain my composure and pick up my feet once again; to freefall into the unknown, to venture out into the open and smell the roses.

Anyway, I am going to raise positivity up a level, pop the smiling mode in overdrive and write.

I recently checked and I am sashaying into the second phase of my life. Well, almost.

Life whiles away far too quickly. Our days have been numbered. Since the beginning of time, from the very moment the hot prince of air kisses our lips.

I disliked the idea very much when I was younger. I despised the idea of death, an ending from this world to a beginning in eternity.

The two things that I hated most was to visit someone in a hospital or to attend a funeral.

It was not because I did not care for the person. I just loathed the aura, the vibe the hospital releases. It was far from pleasant, it was horrible.

In the case of funerals or wakes, I would tear up and sniffle at Amazing Grace (which is a top hit for the event, mind you).

All that changed not too long ago, a year ago to be exact. I had to 'fess up to reality.

Now, since I am still not fond of talking about it in person, I am putting it in writing.

One day (that day will come, the uncertainty is on the when) I will be pushing up daisies. It's inevitable.

When that day comes, forget the achievements, accolades (if any). Strike that out from your eulogy speech.

Make it raw yet delicate, tell others of who I was to you. A side of me shown to you, a facet of my personality you have managed to catch a glimpse of that others may not have the opportunity of. Random (sometimes doofus-y) acts which made you laugh, stuff that make you go, "That is so like Melissa", all that.

This post may be riding on a solemn, depressing (to some) tone.

My take on it most imperative is: In every end, there is a beginning.

However, do not let it have a beginning only when it has reached an end. That would be tragic, on top of heart-breaking.