Chatty Lass

I woke up this morning, sat up and spent a good 30 minutes pondering on life and death.

There is something sobering about how life and death works. I find it disturbing, intricate and interesting all as one.

Life in itself is rich. The opportunity to live life, to wake up every morning and waft in the scent of a brand new day is incredibly fulfilling.

Yet, I am frequently plagued with the truth that where I am today, it will not be this way for eternity. It is not meant to last till the end of time. It is not a place where I am commissioned to live forever.

In death, there is sorrow, heartache and a deep sense of loss. In every death, there is mourning. However, in situations like that, I can attest to the comfort of God upon my grieving heart and settle in the promise that that person is dancing in the arms of my Heavenly Daddy.

Today, it struck a chord deep within me. My time here is short, life is whiling away. There is an urgency in my spirit, the time is now.

The hour has arrived, the clock is ticking and there is so much to do. We all have so much to do.

With that, I am so challenged to sow into everlasting purposes. To not get caught up with temporal treasures and be lulled into earthly pleasures.

Instead, have abiding causes for my Loved One and to carry an interminable mandate: To be a radical believer for Him and be an ambassador of His love.

CS Lewis summed up my heart by saying this,

(Verse 1)
If I wrote a note to God
I would speak what's in my soul
I’d ask for all the hate to be swept away
For love to overflow

If I wrote a note to God
I’d pour my heart out on each page
I’d ask for war to end
For peace to mend this world

(Pre-Chorus)
I’d say, I’d say, I’d say

(Chorus - 1st half)
Give us the strength to make it through
Help us find love, cause love is over due
And it seems like so much is going wrong
On this road, we’re on

(Verse 2)
If I wrote a note to God
I’d say, Please help us find our way
End all the bitterness
Put some tenderness in our hearts

(Pre-Chorus)

(Chorus - Full)
Give us the strength to make it through
Help us find love cause love is over due
And it looks like we haven’t got a clue
Need some help from you

Grant us the faith to carry on
Give us hope when it seems all hope is gone
Cause it seems like so much is going wrong
On this road we’re on

(Bridge)
No, no no no
We can’t do this on our own

(Chorus - Full)

(Bridge)

(Ending)
If I wrote a note to God

P/S: Beautiful song, breathtaking voice. I teared up almost immediately.

Dear Dee Dee,

It has been two years (already?) and our friendship hasn't even taken a backseat.

If I were to compare it to anything, I would say our friendship is like lavender. Rows and rows of lavender. Absolutely beautiful and incredibly sweet-smelling.

I see you 5 days in a week, text you on the remaining 2 days and the times we catch up amounts to almost 6 days in one whole week (and on the 7th day, I rest).

You have been my source of joy, tons of laughter and heaps of fun. I am so very blessed to call you my dearest friend.

Happy Birthday, love.

Tons of love, many hugs and kisses,
Mellie.

Comfortable armchairs; fantastic for curling up with a book, lots of plush cushions and surrounded by favourite reads.

I can't think of a better way to unwind and relax.

I can't say I'm too sorry playing it all by myself. Only because, I am winning every game. =p

37 I Love You-s.

I can't help but feel incredibly loved right now. And yes, this is for remembering (gloating might be included) purposes.

One of the greatest blessings of God upon my life (aside from my family) is fantastic friends; a circle of close-knit, almost family people. Those whom I talk to on a daily basis, text when I come across anything remotely interesting, share my bed with, converse for hours over cups of latte or tea and mostly, those whom I trust with my life (secrets included).

I love you too, dearest.

Of late, I think that my posts have been rather personal. However, I believe that some things are worth sharing; to inspire, to encourage and to strengthen.

The December schedule was out, I am to lead worship today. I was hyped up, so enthusiastic about it. The first few days, I couldn’t wait for Sunday to arrive; rubbing my hands together gleefully at the thought of it.

Come Friday - between rushing to meet assignment deadlines and hunger pangs - I drove to seek for food, completely forgot and turned into a junction, which is a double-line (translation: I was not supposed to make a turning into that particular road).

Unfortunately for me, the police were lying in wait that day and I was flagged to the side of the road.

The wheels of motion were already set; hence the officer–in-charge carried it out by the book. Reluctantly, however.

Playing dumb, I innocently waited for him to pop the question. He did. And, I replied, “No. I am a Christian, I will not succumb to doing that.”

Disappointment made apparent, he decided to give it one more shot by saying, “Well then, I have to do what I have to do. If only you could float me with some cash, this could all go away.”

I remained defiant, maintaining my stand.

As the summon was issued, I couldn’t help but feel crushed. My morale plunged into disappointment.

The summon clutched in my fist, I slowly trudged back to my car. As I sat myself down, tears began streaming down my face.

I didn’t know what caused the waterworks.

All I knew was at that moment in time, something transpired in my heart and my mind could not comprehend what it was, but I knew it was a consummation of love. It was something so precious, so tangible, so palpable.

I had to drive a distance to regain my composure before making my way back.

Upon reaching home, I scrambled to my room, knelt before my King and proceeded to have the most beautiful 2 hours of my entire life.

All I can say from this incident is:

1. NEVER EVER cross a double-line.
2. More importantly, NEVER forget that the double-line exists.

I am merely digressing, for humour purposes (If that actually worked).

This post is not meant to bluster, boasting my own song of being ‘holier than thou’.

See, this incident was a test of faith.

No one was around at that moment to witness if I did decide to perform that act. I will honestly say, there was that flickering thought, “How easy would it have been, if I had just settled it then and there.”

There is a price to pay, to do the right thing.

This incident, this test of faith costs me RM 180. In your walk of life, it may be something else.

I’ll tell you something else more important: Pay that price (literally, in my case).

Because, I am sure I passed with flying colours.

The result of this little test of faith is an experience so awesome; nothing could ever quite amount to it. It is utterly priceless.

I am so ruined for all else.

As much as I prefer face-to-face communication, every now and then, having an IM conversation has been proven beneficial for my mental health.

I was conversing with a friend, and perhaps, I should share a portion of my dreams in life here. For solidifying purposes, to not forget it and some day if I need direction, I could look through the chronicles of Chatty Lass and be sure to make the right decision.

See, I enjoy cultivating and nurturing my imagination. In fact, I believe that it is rather healthy to do so. Time and again, it has provided escapism from the harsh reality into a world of endless possibilities and countless dreams. Suffice to say, I name day(or night)dreaming as one of my favourite pastimes.

So, here goes.

What I am sharing today comes straight from my heart, no fancy trimmings. They happen to be my deepest desires in life, straight from the pages of my journal.

The process of translating matters of the heart into words is no simple task, and please understand that I don’t ever do this lightly.



As I transferred the details of my journal into cyberspace, I noticed that the ink on the pages were smeared and blotty. My vision got cloudy.

I raised my hands to my cheeks and realised they were damp.